• Rasputin vs Stalin. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Thanos vs J Robert Oppenheimer. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Donald Trump vs Joe Biden. Epic Rap Battles Of History
  • The Joker vs Pennywise. Epic Rap Battles Of History
  • Eastern Philosophers vs Western Philosophers. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Steven Spielberg vs Alfred Hitchcock. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Steve Jobs vs Bill Gates. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Donald Trump vs Hillary Clinton. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Artists vs TMNT. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Elon Musk vs Mark Zuckerberg. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • James Bond vs Austin Powers. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Barack Obama vs Mitt Romney. Epic Rap Battles Of History
  • Rick Grimes vs Walter White. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Michael Jackson VS Elvis Presley. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Alexander the Great vs Ivan the Terrible. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Hitler vs Vader 2. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Gandhi vs Martin Luther King Jr. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Theodore Roosevelt vs Winston Churchill. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Cleopatra VS Marilyn Monroe. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Guy Fawkes vs Che Guevara. Epic Rap Battles of History.
  • Mozart vs Skrillex. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Ronald McDonald vs The Burger King. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Mother Teresa vs Sigmund Freud. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Sir Isaac Newton vs Bill Nye. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Harry Potter vs Luke Skywalker. Epic Rap Battles Of History
  • Vlad the Impaler vs Count Dracula. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Jeff Bezos vs Mansa Musa. Epic Rap Battles Of History
  • John Wick vs John Rambo vs John McClane. Epic Rap Battles Of History
  • Stephen King vs Edgar Allan Poe. Epic Rap Battles of History.
  • Gordon Ramsay vs Julia Child. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • George Carlin vs Richard Pryor. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Moses vs Santa Claus. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Deadpool vs Boba Fett. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Mario Bros vs Wright Bros. Epic Rap Battles of History.
  • Jim Henson vs Stan Lee. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Ghostbusters vs Mythbusters. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Jack the Ripper vs Hannibal Lecter. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Jacques Cousteau vs Steve Irwin. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Ragnar Lodbrok vs Richard The Lionheart. Epic Rap Battles of History.
  • Adam vs Eve. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Goku vs Superman. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Shaka Zulu vs Julius Caesar. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Frank Sinatra vs Freddie Mercury. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Frederick Douglass vs Thomas Jefferson. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Michael Jordan vs Muhammad Ali. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Romeo and Juliet vs Bonnie and Clyde. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Blackbeard vs Al Capone. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Wonder Woman vs Stevie Wonder. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Miley Cyrus vs Joan of Arc. Epic Rap Battles of History
  • Bob Ross vs Pablo Picasso. Epic Rap Battles of History

Epic rap battles of history!
Lao Tzu, Sun Tzu, and Confucius!
Versus!
Nietzsche, Socrates, and Voltaire!
Begin!

I'm coming off the Acropolis to start some pandemonium
Don't bring limp raps to a pimp slap symposium
The mad gadfly, philosophy was my invention
Rolling with the flyest nihilist
And me, their French henchman
We got the wisdom
And the wit
That even I couldn't question

Dropping Western medicine
On these East infections
It's evident
You've never been
Our type of mental brethren
We're better
Thinkers
Better speakers
Better lovers
Better men

This type of arrogance is sure to be expected
From men who speak of wisdom with no clue of what respect is
You westerners are sloppy, needing discipline in life
You lack control of yourselves, and of the mic
While we use precise strikes to disrupt your concentration
Hand you an ass-whipping our descendants will honor for generations

We filled a nation
With patience
And the presence
For living
And you'll never hold a candle to the wisdom we've written

Oh, I'll give you something you can bow and cow-tow to
...

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