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An Area Homosexual Thinks He's Still In The Closet
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Life Is Unfair
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Homoerotic Undertones Spice Up An NRA Meeting
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Blind People Are Faking It
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Christ Returns To The NBA
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All US Males Have Been Renamed Dudley
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A Multicultural Mural Celebrates A Diverse Lack Of Talent
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A Drunken Man Makes An Interesting Point About Society
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A Mean Man Has Shut Down The Candy Factory
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A Mix Tape Expresses The Subtleties Of A Long Term Relationship
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A Big Hair Lady Loves Jesus
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An Area Man Doesn't Know What To Do With All The Extra Ketchup Packets
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An Unknown Gunman In A Hardee's Parking Lot Is On The Verge Of International Fame
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The Supreme Court Overturns A Car
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A Baseball Hero Hits A Homerun For A Dying Billionaire
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A Ten Year Old Denies Girl Liking Allegations
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An Area Man Goes And Gets Himself Hit By A Goddamn Bus
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Babies Are Stupid
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A Horribly Awkward First Sexual Encounter Was Quote 'Worth The Wait' For A Pair Of Christian Newlyweds
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You Are Pretty
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All Natural Food Preservative Causes All Natural Cancer
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An Adorable Puppy Nets Its Owner A Handjob
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Alzheimers Victims Demand A Cure For Pancakes
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a Local Man Might as Well Just Give Up
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A Broke Dad Makes His Son A Playstation 2 For Christmas
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A New Railway Line Is Slated To Be Built Straight Up Your Ass
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An Ant Is Born
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a One Hundred Fourteen Year Old attributes Longevity to Random Chance
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A New Pen Brings A Fleeting Moment Of Satisfaction To A Local Man
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A Boyfriend Vows To Try Harder
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A Man Buys A Gun And Becomes All Powerful
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A Birthday Boy Admits Accepting Gifts
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A New Study Shows Broads Are Making Progress
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A Serial Killer Describes His Neighbours As Quiet And Unsuspecting
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Mr. T Will Pity A Fool
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A Man With A New 40 Disk CD Changer Needs More CD's
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A Breakthrough Drug Eliminates Crying In Infants
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An Area Man Is Unafraid To Try New Snacks
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A New Study Finds College Binge-Drinking To Be A Blast
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A Fat Man Is Killed In A Wicker Chair Disaster
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A New Version Of Olean Produces Less Violent Crap Fits
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Stupid Thing Won't Work
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A Beloved Minister Dies Just As He Lived - Of A Heart Attack
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An Area [Censored]hole Stays On Top Of The Latest Trends In A Changing Marketplace
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Three Hundred Naked Women Are Feared Lost In A Computer Crash
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NASA Has Merged With NASCAR
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A Woman Has Been Injured In A Hostile Makeover
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An Education Department Study Reveals Seniors Rule
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A Creative Asterisk Makes Readers Unaware Of The Word [Censored]
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A Giant Metal Bird Devours Hundreds
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